Burns Day

Did you Google something today and wonder what this is for?

Well... today (January 25) is Robbie Burns Day, which is the birthday of Robert Burns, Scotland's national poet and a great source of national pride.  It is traditional on this day to do all sorts of Scottish things like enjoying a Burns Supper which includes Scotch whiskey, haggis, neeps, and tatties (Scotland's national dish).  It is highly recommended that you just enjoy the meal and avoid the question of what's in it.  The Burns Supper is often a black tie event and there is a very specific order of the supper beginning with a little social mixer and moving into the reciting of the Selkirk Grace:

Some hae meat and canna eat,
And some wad eat that want it;
But we hae meat, and we can eat,
And sae let the Lord be thankit.

The entering of the haggis is the main event.  Bagpipes play traditional songs named for Burns and everyone stands as it is brought in.  Then Robert Burns' famous "Address to a Haggis" is read:

Fair fa' your honest, sonsie face, Grat chieftain o' the puddin-race! Aboon them a' ye tak your place, Painch, tripe, or thairm: Weel are ye wordy o' a grace As lang's my arm.	(sonsie = jolly/cheerful) (aboon = above) (painch = paunch/stomach, thairm = intestine)
The groaning trencher there ye fill, Your hurdies like a distant hill, Your pin wad help to mend a mill In time o' need, While thro' your pores the dews distil Like amber bead.	(hurdies = buttocks)
His knife see rustic Labour dicht, An' cut you up wi' ready slicht, Trenching your gushing entrails bricht, Like ony ditch; And then, O what a glorious sicht, Warm-reekin, rich!	(dicht = wipe, here with the idea of sharpening) (slicht = skill) (reeking = steaming)
Then, horn for horn, they stretch an' strive: Deil tak the hindmaist! on they drive, Till a' their weel-swall'd kytes belyve, Are bent like drums; Then auld Guidman, maist like to rive, "Bethankit" hums.	(deil = devil) (swall'd = swollen, kytes = bellies) (auld Guidman = the man of the house belyve = soon) (rive = tear, i.e. burst)
Is there that o're his French ragout Or olio that wad staw a sow, Or fricassee wad mak her spew Wi' perfect scunner, Looks down wi' sneering, scornfu' view On sic a dinner?	(olio = stew, from Spanish olla'/stew pot, staw = make sick) (scunner = disgust)
Poor devil! see him ower his trash, As feckless as a wither'd rash, His spindle shank, a guid whip-lash, programme His nieve a nit; Thro' bloody flood or field to dash, O how unfit!	(nieve = fist, nit = louse's egg, i.e. tiny)
But mark the Rustic, haggis fed, The trembling earth resounds his tread. Clap in his wallie nieve a blade, He'll mak it whistle; An' legs an' arms, an' heads will sned, Like taps o' thristle.	(wallie = mighty, nieve = fist) (sned = cut off) (thristle = thistle)
Ye Pow'rs wha mak mankind your care, And dish them out their bill o' fare, Auld Scotland wants nae skinkin ware That jaups in luggies; But, if ye wish her gratefu' prayer, Gie her a haggis!

Then there is the Toast to the Lassies, which is a toast given by a man to the women of the group.  It is usually pretty funny and not intended to be offensive although I am sure it was a little different in its beginnings.  The last thing is the singing of the Auld Lang Syne, which is a source of national pride, but is joked about because no one really knows what it means.

Should auld acquaintance be forgot,
and never brought to mind ?
Should auld acquaintance be forgot,
and auld lang syne ?

CHORUS:

For auld lang syne, my jo, for auld lang syne, we’ll tak a cup o’ kindness yet, for auld lang syne.

And surely ye’ll be your pint-stowp !
and surely I’ll be mine !
And we’ll tak a cup o’ kindness yet,
for auld lang syne.

CHORUS

We twa hae run about the braes,
and pu’d the gowans fine ;
But we’ve wander’d mony a weary fit,
sin auld lang syne.

CHORUS

We twa hae paidl’d i' the burn,
frae morning sun till dine ;
But seas between us braid hae roar’d
sin auld lang syne.

CHORUS

And there’s a hand, my trusty fiere !
and gie's a hand o’ thine !
And we’ll tak a right gude-willy waught,
for auld lang syne.

CHORUS

Although I probably won't attend a traditional Burns Supper due to lack of funds (the really authentic ones are extremely expensive), I do plan on eating haggis for the first time which is exciting and terrifying at the same time.  I am confident that this already sketchy dish will be served up at the cafeteria of Pollock Halls, which is an even scarier thought.  However, it is an experience that every Scotsman and anyone who has spent time here highly recommends, so for this reason I will sacrifice.
Here's what "piping in the haggis" looks like and the reading of Burns' "Address to a Haggis"